I never normally write any posts like this. Deep and so personal – however – since a journalist I used to speak to a lot for work wrote a book called Why Social Media Is Ruining Your Life I thought it would be ideal. The journalist I am speaking of is Katherine Ormerod. She has written her first book explaining how life behind social media can be helpful, satisfying and very creative however it can also be deceitful, lonely and fake. 

I can understand what she means and she has even started a # about how social media can ruining you life – explaining the behind the scenes on some of her Instagram pictures. When you look at your feed it is easy to think the people you follow are having the time of their life –  looking amazing at a festival, when secretly they hate the outdoors, earning a great job going to events and eating lunches and dinners with well known folk – when really they hate the long commute and their co-workers. 

There is so much that we, personally, hide behind our finger tips and screens and so does the rest of the world. The book is a game changer and I highly recommend it. It mentions motherhood, working in the fashion industry, family, friends and more. So I can highly relate and it really made me think about my social media journey and how I show myself in those little squares. You obviously want to show the best of the best – but is it so bad to show the worst?? Not at all – some of the best accounts I follow I love because they are honest and really funny too. Some I learn from – anything to do with work, kids – teething, feeding and cooking for my family, a lot are work related, styling, places to travel too and more. Like Father of Daughters – I love looking at his life with his kids and the things he does, he is hilarious. He shows the truth behind raising a young family and being a working, busy dad. I laugh every day at Does My Bum Look 40, Kat shows you her busy days out with kids who are teenagers, along with her bloody brilliant fashion outfits and bold sense of humour. The first story I saw of her was one where she was arguing with her daughter in regards to her attitude in the car. I was instantly hooked. 

Whats my point? 

No one is perfect. All the accounts you follow have feelings, bills, anxiety and maybe even insecurities. We are all in fact human and we all make mistakes because we are busy. If you take away the phone – only for a few hours a day and interact with society (like we did 15 years ago) then you will honestly feel so much better. It is not about likes, who has the better filter app, who has the best job, which child is the most behaved, who went to the best pumpkin patch…When your phone is not working and you just want a hug – technology can not give you that feeling. Your friends and family can!

I do try to post some of the bad on my social media feed – but I also am a believer of keeping some things private. You and only you, can choose what to put out on the world wide web. I like to share my ideas and adventures with everyone so they too can enjoy the places I have discovered, or brands I have found. However, some things I think I dont want the world to see. 

Remember they are memories also – I am a photo taker and always have been. Behind 1 great photo are 10 bad ones, trust me. 

As a mum I follow a lot of mummy bloggers and influencers. In the long run, we are all doing the same thing. We are making and raising babies to be the best girls and boys they can be. I think everyone needs teething advise, tips on choosing the right schools and with a handful of close friends to give me the big green tick – I also like to see online what other mums do too. Life as a mum – can be lonely and you do feel that you are working around Groundhog day. Social media is a great way of staying in the loop and expressing passions and lessons learnt. Just remember to be kind with it and have fun. 

Everyone is taking life so seriously and that is what gets you in deep water. 

Some tips on how to deal with Social Media, and make sure it is perfect for you?

  • Only you can curate your feed. Decide which images you would like to show and not show – you might want to mix up the baby images with some home images (as you are redecorating) with some quotes. You dont have to plan every week – have fun and remember you post whatever you want. 
  • Delete, check and add new ones – I went through a massive Instagram list a few weeks back and deleted accounts that made me feel like crap, act like I was crazy and ones I thought was very negative. I feel so much better for it. It really does make you feel great. 
  • Stay on the positive. Remember you live in the real world. If you are feeling over whelmed take a break from social media. Go on a walk, read a book. You will not miss anything. The world will still move and everything will be the same when you come back. 
  • Dont be so harsh on yourself. If you see your friends, family, ex-co worker living the high life. Be kind and nice to them. They deserve it, and your time will come too. 

Hope that helps and you really should read the book. Its amazing and will make you think twice about how you look into your social media too. 

Much Love

Assuntina X

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